Category Archives: Inversions

I’ve Finally Decided To Stop a Habit That Is No Longer Serving Me

I haven’t written in a while, but things have mostly been going extremely well.  Everything except one thing in my life has been close to perfect since October turned into November, and the weather has gotten colder.

This one thing has kind of been a “thing” for a while.  But I’ve been ignoring it, and coming up with excuses as to why I don’t need to change it.  It’s a habit, and something that I’ve done daily for some time now.  And, something that has no longer been serving me for a while, even though it use to bring me happiness in my past and serve me greatly.

So I decided yesterday that I was going to slow down/cut out this habit completely, so that I could feel good about everything in my life, and not just almost everything.

This morning was a little rough for me.  My body was sweating.  My mind was growing more and more anxious.  I didn’t feel good, and it was hard, and challenging, and I needed to throw myself into something.

So I got onto YouTube and watched yoga tutorial videos of how to get into crow pose, and then I went to my living room and proceeded to practice crow pose.  And then I started practicing tripod headstands, and then went onto practice my handstands and forearm balances.

For the first time ever today I took a tripod headstand.  I took several of them, and held them for long lengths of time.  I didn’t even know that I could do this pose.  Before today, I’ve only done classical bound headstand.

For the first time ever today I also held a few crow poses! I’ve never really been in that pose, not like I was today!

And it just all blew my mind! What I was capable of, and what my body was capable of, when I stopped a habit that was no longer serving me and threw myself into something that serves me greatly (my yoga practice.)

After close to an hour of practicing these inversions my body was no longer sweating and shaking.  My head felt clearer.  My heart was pumping, and I felt great.  Ecstatic.  Proud.  More confident

So I decided to continue this trend and head to a yoga class that I’ve been putting off going to for over a month because I’ve been too busy lazing around at home and feeding my habit.

I invited a yogi friend to go with me, and I’m so glad that I did.  I told him in the car about my addiction, about my weening, and about how it’s no longer serving me.  Sometimes just talking with someone, and getting the words out, and getting it all out into the universe helps.  It definitely helped tonight, and taking that yoga class tonight cleared my head even further.

Now I can say that I’m finally working with crow pose.  Now I can say that I can do two types of headstands instead of one. Now I’ve just spent a day doing great things with my body and my mind, instead of curled up on my couch in the fetal position crying, sweating, and shaking.

Wow.   What a beautiful day this turned out to be.

Thank you for reading if you read to the end, but I needed to get that all out.  I need to get this habit, this dependency, out of my system, but I’ve got a strong headstart on it by making some good choices today.

Tales of Inversions, Lost Car Keys, and Long Distance Friendships

This week has felt like an absolute dream.  It seemed like a piece of cake, and it passed by so calmly.  It’s like I barely felt the work days, the hours upon hours of labor, and the wishing of it all to just be over.

Having Monday off all day with the love of my life helped, I’m sure.  Tuesday was fun and joyous.  Wednesday morning, on my day off, I decided to practice forearm stands and handstands.  I almost never practice any yoga at home.  97% of my practice happens in a yoga studio, and only about 3% at home.  I especially never work on my inversions or challenging poses that I’m trying to master.

So I was extremely surprised and bewildered to find that I was able to hold both a forearm stand and a handstand…for several moments at at time!  It was a first for both, and I felt elated and strong.  My body, going into them, felt like a different body from the one I had this past winter when I was practicing my headstands at home.  Both of these inversions were just so much more….available to me.  It wasn’t hard to find the strength.  Because of this it was easy to trust myself to hold my body upside down while playing around with finding that balance…that precious balance where your body is perfectly aligned, hips over shoulders, belly engaged, head below heart, mind free and wild.

This experience showed me that I need to practice at home this Fall.  My body has changed over the Summer with all the yoga classes I’ve attended weekly, and its time to get playful.  And to set new goals for myself.

Afterwards I trekked over to Ayanna’s and we exchanged massages.  I haven’t seen her since she went on maternity leave in March (and never came back to work!) Her baby is beautiful, just like her older son.  We hadn’t traded massages in probably a year, and it was nice to catch up and laugh while we rubbed out each others knots.

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Afterwards I traveled far North to have dinner with one of my very best friends, Jesse, who is in town from Georgia for a wedding.  She only comes to town 2-3 times a year, and so it’s only then that we get to see each other.  She’s going to be our second bridesmaid when we get married next Fall, and her daughter is going to be one of our flower girls. We had dinner with a few of her other friends, and we all ordered drinks and laughed and stuffed ourselves silly.   It was an amazing evening to an already amazing day.

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I lost my car keys for the second time in two weeks at work last night, and at first I was upset, and panicked, and frustrated.  But, Alana picked me up from work last night and dropped me back off again this morning (I keep a spare key at home).  My car didn’t get stolen, broken into, or ticketed.  Everything ended up okay, and now the weekend is here.

Alana and I have plans to start it out with a restorative yoga class tomorrow morning before celebrating the birthdays of three of our family members this weekend!  All these birthday festivities are going to require lots of money and lots of driving, but it’ll come with family, love, and laughter.  I’m feeling grateful for friends, especially long distance ones.  Or ones that I haven’t seen since there was snow on the ground.

I’m feeling grateful for the strength of my body, and for it’s healthiness and it’s progress.  As I am every week, I’m grateful that I found yoga last Fall.

I’m grateful for my fiancé, and for her willingness to pick me up from/drop me off at my job when my scatter-brained self lost my keys once again.

I’m grateful for both our families.  I’m grateful that it’s the weekend.

I’m grateful that I survived another week, and for my ability to find bliss in the small, everyday things.

Namaste.

Headstands and Beach Weekends

This weekend we packed up our things and headed to the beach. It was a pretty amazing weekend from start to finish.

Beach 2We found a cute little Italian place to have dinner.  We found an awesome coffee shop with a drive thru that made the best frozen coffee.  We lay out on the beach for hours together, talking together, and reading together.

I honestly don’t think I could marry someone who I couldn’t lay side by side on the beach with for hours and hours upon end.

I got as close as I dared to the ocean and took a couple of headstands.  This was a new beginning for me, in a way.  Since beginning yoga eight months ago I’ve only taken headstands in a few yoga studios and in my own living room at home.  I’ve never taken a headstand anywhere in nature, or anywhere that wasn’t on solid ground. Beach Headstand

The sand proved to be ground enough.  I actually found it easy to take a headstand on the sand.  They were the most peaceful headstands I’ve ever taken.  I faced the ocean while I took them, and just staring at the ocean for moments at a time while being upside down was a beautiful feeling.  I almost always get a rush when I take a headstand.  But no headstands I’ve taken thus far come anywhere close to being as amazing as the few I took on the beach this weekend.

I’m currently gearing up to work five days in a row this week.  Our beach weekend is over, and that’s a sad fact.

This upcoming Saturday we’ll be touring our first wedding venue of the year, so I’ll have more to write about soon.  Never a dull moment in the lesbian chronicles!